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Re: Falling off the Wagon
Yeah well it happened again. I've been trying to quit something for a while. Been doin really well for a while now but tonight I did it again and I'm at a lost for words cause I thought I was stronger than this. Anyone ever try and quit something but it just keeps haunting you and keeps coming back into your life? How did you deal?
Re: Falling off the Wagon
I thought it was "on the wagon?"
Lately I've been trying to quit eating shitty food and snacking. I was great at it for a while, but since September it's come back to haunt me. All has to do with the added stress of school and study and not having time to prepare healthy meals. I'm back at the gym again and I'm hoping this new kick will help me get my eating in line once again.
Re: Falling off the Wagon
Had some pretty big problems with meth(and to a certain extent coke) back in the good old days, but eventually quit that shit. Moving away from that scene and not associating with those types was a big reason I was able to quit for good. Now I have zero desire to do it, and can easily turn it down if offered.
Had an on and off drinking problem for many years as well, and was somehow able to stop drinking. I have no desire for liquor, and the sight(and specifically the smell) literally make me ill. When I go out, I try and stay away from it, and if some girl I am going out with starts drinking, any erection I had(or would've had) sinks like the Titanic. I cant stand the smell of that shit(or the taste of it) in a woman's mouth.
Smoked weed for ages, but everyone knows that story. Had really strange headaches a few years back and I thought it was a brain tumor, and quit smoking dope during that ordeal and never started again.
My only vice is cigarettes, and I have cut back dramatically on my use of pain pills.
The key to not using is staying out of the environment where it is used. Then you will develop the habit of not even needing it.
- monkeychow
- Rep: 661
Re: Falling off the Wagon
Yeah well it happened again. I've been trying to quit something for a while. Been doin really well for a while now but tonight I did it again and I'm at a lost for words cause I thought I was stronger than this. Anyone ever try and quit something but it just keeps haunting you and keeps coming back into your life? How did you deal?
I think one thing to do is to not let one slip up ruin everything. Like dont let messing up that time (or times) become an excuse to yourself of "now i'm fucked again". In the end of the day you are stronger than it...so just forget a mistake and remember what it is you want to do..which is stay clean...
Easier said than done i know - but its doable
Re: Falling off the Wagon
I gave up eating shitty food only to replace it with alcohol. When my alcohol consumption turned into an alcohol problem I kicked that only to replace it with weed. I'm actually worried that if I give up dope it'll only be replaced by something worse
I don't have the willpower to just outright "quit" something. I'll slowly move away from one vice and ease myself into the next, it's a pretty bad cycle to be honest so I shouldn't be giving anyone advice on how to quit something.
- the_real_jessica
- Rep: 22
Re: Falling off the Wagon
I have three addictions :
food as i am bullimic, so i gain a LOT of weight in my bullimia phases and have to go on long proper diets to loose the weight afterwards.
I hate myself when i open the fridge or a cupboard and eat anything i find to fill me.
But i accept it and know weight can be lost.
I prefer to eat rather than become depressive or violent, which i could do if i had no other alternative.
Tobacco, i started smoking at 10 years old and quit twice already, both times for a year, i was good without and both times, difficult emotionnal downs made me start again.
I feel bad about it because of many reasons.
Toxic relationships, but this is on the mend.
- luckylittlelady
- Rep: 20
Re: Falling off the Wagon
I think I had a drink problem about 4/5 years ago. I would have a drink before going to work, at lunch, as soon as I got in and drink till I fell asleep. I would hide bottles in the back of wardrobes and in the coal shed. I stopped because I had to, I'm not pleasant to be around when I'm drunk and it just exacerbates my depression. I do still have a glass of wine with a meal occasionally but I never get drunk anymore, it has been the cause of too many problems for me. My mother and uncle are both alcoholics and I'm terrified I'll go the same way.
- the_real_jessica
- Rep: 22
Re: Falling off the Wagon
Actually, my mother is an alcoholic, has been (in my memory) since i was about 10 years old ( that also coincides with dates in my life i'd rather forget, but i wonder wether her alcoholism triggered events in my life or if it were the events that triggered her alcoholism ? ).
Anyway, it went more and more until one day, she fell down the home stairs, coughing up blood.
That didn't make her stop.
" One day, i had invited a gay male friend over for diner, and as usual, she was highly embarassing, boasting about my sex life to him ( as if he cared, he is gay ( as if she knew anyway lol)).
I got so angry that i thought " that's IT" and went upstairs using the " ladies" excuse and went to my dad's office to get the voice recorder.
I hid it under the table for the rest of the evening, recording.
The next morning, as soon as she got up, i played it to her.
She got very violent, told me i was lying, that i had mixed it to sound like she had said it ( I did music mixing then, i am a woman of many talents lol).
I had to slap her to calm her down and told her that i knew she wouldn't remember, knew she would call me liar and that now, i had PROOF to show to people ( there is nothing she fears more than having her reputation crushed, although she never realised how goofy and embarassing she had always been anyway, she is a calamity, i am truly ashamed of my mother, it doesn't go away and i tried my very best)
Once she calmed down, we prepared for work, as she was brocanting and i had come back from england so i worked with her.
I was so upset a fellow woman brocanter asked me what was wrong, and i confided.
Next thing i know, she takes my mother to a brasserie for coffee for the pause.
After coming home from work, in the afternoon, my mother pops out.
I was worried she would out to go drinking or something, she would actually do this at the time.
She came back hours later, accompanied by the fellow woman brocanter.
This woman came over to me, sat me down as mum looked embarassed and told me :
" I have just become your mother's AA " godmother".
From then, she went better.
I had spoken to an alcoholic without knowing, and she got mum to try and cure herself.
Mum still drinks, always will, but i hope never to the point of almost dying like she once did.
My brother drinks too much too.
I did drink a lot too, between 17 and 19, but i was extremely lucky to be taken to the emergencies in a coma for a kidney infection that year and i saw women who had drink problems and what it had done to them.
Although i had been to hospital, it wasn't because of drinking.
But i told myself i would never drink again while there and i did not touch alcohol at all for 4 years following this event.
Since, i drink extremely rarely. I don't even like alcohol really.
The fear of hurting my kidneys was bigger than anything and still is.
I don't know when i"ll go, but i don't want to go in pains.
Sorry guys, i know i spoke a lot there, but it needed to come out.
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